Yes, I wish I'd left sooner

So this morning I got to thinking about long-term relationships, or LTRs. I understand that abbreviation might cause one's brain to add (like I just did) an 'O' and make it LOTR (Lord of the Rings) so let's just hope that doesn't happen. After a brief fifteen minutes spent looking back on my two LTRs and those of my close female friends, I realized a startling (and disturbing) coincidence, and my mother's voice began nagging in my head. "A new guy always seems so much better when you're still in a relationship." I wish there were a clearer way to word that, and there probably is, but it's not even ten AM. Give me a break. But the question I'm looking to answer is do these "crushes" and "new guys" that appear while we females are still tied down play a major role in the end of LTRs? Do potential future boyfriends give us the strength to leave relationships that should end anyway? Or are they the sole reason we left the relationship?

Sure, I don't want to discredit the strength of my female friends, or women in general, but the truth is the times that my friends have ended relationships without another man in sight are far and few compared to the times they left with the sight of someone else on the horizon. Personally, I've never had the well, balls, to leave a relationship on time. I still sit around, with the self-esteem I possessed in high school, wondering if anyone else will "like" me. My first serious relationship I probably should have hopped out around year marker two and a a half or so, but I stayed with him because I was absolutely terrified of being single. Luckily, I would be proven wrong before ending the relationship because someone confessed feelings for me. Who knows, if someone hadn't done that, I might still be sitting in that relationship right now. Let's hope I have a bit more spine to me than that.

LTR number 2. It wasn't that long, but anything over 6 months has to count for something when you've had two real relationships in your life like me. The initial months were superb, but then I started to notice my high highs and lower lows. I'm probably going to have to dedicate an entire post to this relationship, what was wrong with it, and most importantly why I should have started running as fast as I could back in December. The lack of confidence in myself and constant second-guessing is something I hope never to experience in a relationship again.

Sidenote : I vow to always have the upper hand.

Correction : Until I trust someone again (?)

Good luck men, you have your work cut out for you.